In “healing of a violated spirit”, Shelley G. Jones writes of severed relationships, sexual violation, and the devastating effects of spiritual abuse. Through the uniqueness of the author’s writing style, the reader is brought into her once emotionally and spiritually confused existence — then journeys with Shelley and her family through the recovery process. From her experiences as an abuse survivor, and their experiences as husband and wife marriage survivors, she shares a wealth of insights, understanding, and learning. Shelley freely speaks out — offering hope and encouragement that emotional and spiritual wholeness is possible after one’s spirit has been violated — that marriages can survive — and for those who see God through wounded eyes, that reconciliation is possible. Family members, counselors, and ministers — anyone desiring to understand and help a survivor of undeserved victimization will benefit from reading “healing of a violated spirit”.
Shelley G. Jones is a wife, mother, and grandmother. Shelley is also a survivor of childhood sexual and spiritual abuse. After fourteen years of marriage, Shelley found herself on the brink of an emotional breakdown. Hidden beneath her anger, depression, and exhaustion were long forgotten moments of sexual abuse and spiritual unworthiness. Her husband, William, was the man in the house, the man in the bed — the undeserving target of her rage in the present. Throughout the recovery process, Shelley desperately wanted William to see beneath her anger, to understand what she struggled to comprehend, and to love her when she felt her life held little value. William longed to see her emotionally and sexually healthy. But his efforts triggered just the opposite — her emotional fury. Tensions, misunderstandings, and resentments created an ever-widening barrier between them. Yet their marriage not only survived, it thrives.
About the Cover
The cover was designed by graphic designer, Melissa Cohick. For months, she had no inspiration. Then one morning she awoke with the design clearly in her mind – the design had come to her as if “in a whirlwind.”
For me, the barren tree in the foreground represents emotional and spiritual
woundedness, the end result of childhood victimization – the unloving acts that sealed
my unworthiness – the filth that estranged me from God and Jesus.
The background image is a heart.
The outer edges of the heart flow to the deepest, darkest depth of the tree – the core
where pain, sorrow, and woundedness lay buried. Part of the healing process was to
not only learn, but trust (in my timing) that even if I felt shrouded in darkness, God and
Jesus were with me.
Between the heart and the barren tree are the wings of a dove.
The Holy Spirit, symbolized by a dove, was significant in my emotional/spiritual healing.
The more I trusted the leading of the Holy Spirit, the more my fear-shame-guilt-angry
relationship with God and Jesus was changed to a relationship of trust, love, and closeness.
One reader stated while lightly feeling the cover with her fingers, “Joy of the heart cannot be contained when a person experiences God’s healing touch.”
In “healing of a violated spirit,” I write:
•to say that sex with a child, child pornography, assaulting someone with vulgarity, bullying, hurtful teasing, and degrading a person’s worth are not free speech rights.
They are abuse.
•to document the devastating effects of spiritual abuse and toxic religion. •to not merely tell the reader that reconciliation with God after being spiritually wounded is possible but to document my journey to a restored relationship. •to document the validity of repressed memories. •to encourage survivors of all types of abuse or traumatic events to strive for wholeness and healing. •to aid in understanding of how abuse distorts a person view of life, living, God, fun, and relationships. •to show the correlation of panic attacks, perfectionist mannerisms, and claustrophobia. •to bring insight and understanding to relational struggles and how the breakdown in communication (including sexual) affects marriages and families when the marriage involves a survivor of abuse. •to communicate all that I struggled to verbalize throughout the recovery and healing process.
It is my hope that as a society we might firmly say,
“We will not tolerate sexual, spiritual, emotional, and physical abuse any longer!”